For the person buying it for someone else

You're holding it.

Not for you. For someone else.

And suddenly you're wondering if buying them a non-alcoholic drink says something you don't actually mean to say.

Maybe she's pregnant.

Maybe he's drinking less.

Maybe they're driving tonight.

Maybe you don't even know. You just know they might appreciate having the option.

But now you're standing there thinking way too hard about a bottle.

I've been on both sides

I've bought non-alcoholic drinks for people and wondered the same thing.

Is this weird? Am I making a point I don't want to make?

And I've been on the other side too.

I changed how I drink a few years ago. Nothing dramatic. I still drink alcohol. I just drink differently than I used to.

And people noticed.

Wine still shows up at my place, but sometimes there's that little hesitation before someone hands me a bottle.

"You can have this one, right?"

Or someone brings something non-alcoholic and explains why they picked it for me.

They mean well. Always.

But I've realized something from being on both sides of it.

The drink isn't what makes it weird.

It's the weight we put around it.

Don't make it a thing

The best experiences I've had were the simplest ones.

Someone had a good non-alcoholic beer in the fridge.

There was a bottle of wine without alcohol on the table next to everything else.

Nobody announced it. Nobody explained it.

It was just there.

And I could grab it or not.

That's how I think about it now when I'm buying for someone else.

I'm not making a statement about how they should drink.

I'm not telling them I noticed something.

I'm definitely not trying to decide what's best for them.

I'm just giving them another option.

It's not a verdict

I think we sometimes make non-alcoholic drinks carry way more meaning than they need to.

A bottle of wine is just a bottle of wine.

A six-pack is just a six-pack.

And a non-alcoholic drink can just be a really good drink.

So if you're buying for someone, my advice is pretty simple.

Buy something you'd genuinely want to drink yourself.

That's the test.

Don't buy the sad substitute. Don't buy something just because it has 0.0% written on it.

Buy something good.

Then bring it to dinner. Put it in the fridge. Set it on the table with everything else.

No speech required.

If they want it, they'll reach for it.

If they don't, they won't.

That's really it.

You're not buying them a message.

You're giving them a choice.

It's not a verdict. It's an option.

And maybe the best thing we can do is stop treating it like anything more complicated than that.

SP.